Iliman Ndiaye, Globetrotters-Level Skills and Revealing Soccer Stats

COULD IT ACTUALLY HAPPEN?

Should you have overlooked the footage of Iliman Ndiaye executing a unusual dribbling move at Everton’s training ground, you should check it out. By pulling off a move so nasty that it would have suited perfectly at a Harlem Globetrotters show game, the skill quickly concluded what was meant to be a informal game to finish what had been – up to that point – an informative discussion about how non-professionals can earn a second chance after being let go from professional academies.

Ndiaye, who featured in non-league games directly before being signed by Sheffield United at 19, is ideally suited to discuss this topic. “Avoid dwelling on the rejection and one day your luck is going to arrive,” he advised a young player just before executing said impressive trick on his victim, in doing so vividly showing the gulf between Premier League and amateur footballers he had been working to minimize.

Ndiaye joins a list of professional footballer to take things that little bit too far. Peak Michael Owen cheerfully overwhelming a teenage keeper in front of a smouldering Neville Southall is obviously the gold standard in this particular niche – but the one-time Reds forward is not alone in this. Both Christian Eriksen and Shinji Kagawa have reduced toddlers to actual tears with a series of harsh skills, although it’s believed that the latter was at least motivated by the Japanese player’s social media apologetic post – “setbacks build character” – and the associated label of #friendship.

Kagawa’s former Dortmund teammates Lukasz Piszczek, Jakub Blaszczykowski and Nuri Sahin at least had the good grace to lose their match against 100 children when the trio competed during the interval of their final match for BVB. A Real Madrid XI that contained Cristiano Ronaldo and Xabi Alonso were more competitive when they played against 109 Chinese kids in a like situation. But coming full circle, it’s calculated that only 180 of the 1.5 million boys currently playing organized youth football in England will ever appear in the Premier League, a harsh truth for toddlers and teenagers across the country.

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FEATURED STATEMENT

“Football took me but it never left me because I never stopped believing. I went from location to location. The love of football propels you. I couldn’t always see where it was taking me. But today I have the answer” – head coach Veljko Paunovic pauses briefly from his training to share his journey.

FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS

“Pleasant to learn that Kevin Mac Allister won’t be excluded by Argentina. Hopefully, if he travels to the international competition next year, he’ll read up on how to get about the host cities – wouldn’t want him to end up lost in New York” – James Humphries.

“Sources state that 1,024 players in the Turkish league have been prohibited due to alleged involvement in a betting scandal. It would be amazing if that number could be bumped up to the same level of typical pedantry associated with Football Daily – that is, 1,057 readers. By my math, that’s about 33 more detail-oriented individuals. If I agree to be excluded from playing professionally in Turkey (hardly a difficult decision at my age and, um, skill level), are there 32 more folks willing to assist my effort for harmony?” – Mike Wilner.

“As a frequent consumer and Florida resident, can I in advance protest about the next several days of published letters about which road one uses to get to various locations in your homeland? I mean, I was stuck in gridlock on I-4 at 2am on a Tuesday night driving through Orlando once, but that’s the whole story. There’s no meaningful conclusion to the tale. (I-4 links Tampa on the Gulf Coast to Daytona on the Atlantic via Orlando/Walt Disney World, and can have delays at any time)” – Rasteen Nowroozi.

“Regarding Wythenshawe FC, I recall many years ago playing for a Sunday, very social side, Turnpike Lane Hibs, on Clapham Common. One morning a bloke presented as ‘Danny’ turned up to play. I have no idea who invited him. Supposedly he was an actor; he had a useful left foot. (Yes, Daniel Day-Lewis)” – Jason Steger.

“Together with some associates and companions, I play a game of football each Friday afternoon. Our oldest player is approaching eighty, while the least experienced are in their young adulthood. To ensure a positive atmosphere for everyone, we have a basic guideline regarding the ability standard: you can be fast or skilled, but preferably not both. We periodically have players who violate this rule, but usually succeed in bringing them to our standard over time” – Lars Esbjerg.